Jumat, 07 Februari 2020

Birds of Prey review: Margot Robbie and the fantabulous redemption of DC - Ars Technica

Margot Robbie, seen here sporting a shirt that will help you remember her character's name through the course of the film. Oh, and she's also smiling while explaining how she and her cohorts may die within the next few minutes. It's on par for the giddy insanity that is <em>Birds of Prey</em>.
Enlarge / Margot Robbie, seen here sporting a shirt that will help you remember her character's name through the course of the film. Oh, and she's also smiling while explaining how she and her cohorts may die within the next few minutes. It's on par for the giddy insanity that is Birds of Prey.
Warner Bros.

Slowly and doggedly, DC Comics' filmmaking division has been crawling back to relevance. Since the 2016 film that shall not be named, the results have been uneven, with Wonder Woman, Shazam, and Joker's mostly-thumbs-up results being balanced out by the stink of Suicide Squad, Justice League, and Aquaman.

It's been a positive enough trajectory to set the table for this week's stellar Birds of Prey, which appears to benefit from the DC powers-that-be telling its writer, director, and crew to go completely nuts. This bombastic, hypercolor explosion of filmmaking is exactly what the comic-film industry needs: equal parts slapdash and artfully arranged, designed to please anyone who wants more depth and weight in a "light," humor-focused comic film. I went into its screening expecting a killer performance from Margot Robbie as Harley Quinn, which came true. I left surprised and stunned by the rest of the film's bloody, candy-colored pieces falling into place around her performance.

I shaved my what for this?

Let's start with the film's easiest point of praise. DC Comics' Bronx-accented scoundrel Harley Quinn steps out of the shadow of her usual criminal-clown boyfriend, and the results, in Robbie's nimble hands, rank at the top of the modern comic-film acting pantheon. Unlike her performance in Suicide Squad, where the character wavered between "lead" and "sidekick" status, her return in BoP enjoys a front-and-center placement, which the actor relishes.

A quick, spoiler-free plot introduction: Quinn and the Joker have ended their relationship, which we learn after a cartoon-animated recap of Quinn's classic origin story (troubled childhood, became a psychologist, fell in love with a crazed supervillain, yadda yadda). If you're keeping score: this all happens in a self-contained version of DC Comics' Gotham, as opposed to one connected to the events of either Suicide Squad or Joker.

Once the breakup becomes public knowledge, Gotham's underworld is quick to react... because Quinn has picked up some enemies over the years. Now that Joker isn't around to protest or protect, everyone wants their cut of Quinn's figurative (or literal) scalp—perhaps none more than the slimy crime lord Black Mask (Ewan McGregor).

Eventually, the film gets its plot ducks in a row, particularly in connecting the origin stories of Huntress (Mary Elizabeth Winstead), Black Canary (Jurnee Smollett-Bell), and Renee Montoya (Rosie Perez) to Quinn's "fantabulous emancipation" from Joker. One of the first wonderful things about the film, however, is its interest in putting entertainment and insanity ahead of chronology. Time rewinds and fast-forwards whenever Quinn pipes up as a narrator, but always in an announced and appreciable way, as opposed to the silent whiplash you might expect from a Tarantino-esque production.

Quinn's appearances and interruptions function like the filmmakers' id: showing up to blurt, giggle, and set off fireworks whenever the film has an organic opening for humor, combat, or even context. When these moments emerge, Robbie is consistently handed opportunities to smash the film's fourth wall with a carnival-style mallet—sometimes by going nuts, other times by surprising viewers with somber reflections. But every extreme of the character would fall apart without Robbie understanding the subtleties of cartoon-like insanity. Thank goodness she nails a crucial point: Quinn isn't just the film's jester. She's also the everyperson whose urges, excitement, regret, and wide-eyed wonder are easy to empathize with—at least, as sold by Robbie's lovably mischievous performance.

As a result, when she crushes a scumbag's legs with a well-timed stomp, or pours a margarita for a child, or drunkenly falls over while "helping" a cohort fight some creepy men in an alleyway, we laugh as much as we take her side of the story—which is an impressive feat, considering how carelessly she breaks the law and double-crosses friends.

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Robbie also benefits from an incredible foil in McGregor, whose take on Black Mask is hilariously douchey. He's a prissy, squirming germaphobe. He proudly misappropriates African relics, then mansplains them to a person of color. And he goes down a few dramatic insecurity spirals, in ways that honestly show up Jake Gyllenhall's similar, solid work in Spider-man: Far from Home. Perhaps best of all, McGregor lets his natural Scottish accent sneak out while otherwise portraying an American jerk, and the result sounds like an American celebrity who's added a slight British accent for no reason. It's a quality comic touch.

The anti-hero cast of <em>Birds of Prey</em>.
Enlarge / The anti-hero cast of Birds of Prey.
Warner Bros.

To the script's credit, Birds of Prey doesn't try to balance Quinn's anti-hero wackiness with a straight-laced counterpart. It's all anti-heroes here. Huntress is a trauma-fueled vigilante; Canary clings to the criminal world's underbelly while looking out for herself; and Montoya eventually offers figurative middle fingers to her police-force colleagues. The best part is, each non-Quinn character receives a quick-and-dirty mix of backstory and exposition—the kind that sews up the film's logic without slowing its momentum.

Unfortunately, the Montoya plotline sticks too rigidly to classic '70s cop-film cliches, so much so that they eventually become the butt of a joke. Perez's portrayal suffers as a result, with her liveliest moments being limited to the film's conclusion. Smollett-Bell, on the other hand, frequently gets an opportunity to bring Quinn down a peg and shines in her role, while Winstead enjoys a slow-burn opportunity to build Huntress' personality. By the time viewers get to know Huntress' quirks, she offers a perfectly balanced pour of weirdness into a film that's already damned weird.

Birds of Prey has continuity where it counts... which is crucial, because Director Cathy Yan loves otherwise dumping continuity for the sake of fun. Take one moment, where Quinn is soaking in fire-alarm sprinklers while pummeling ex-cons. In the very next, she's completely dry and walloping foes with a conveniently placed baseball bat. What the heck? How'd that happen? Birds of Prey loves setting up these sorts of Wile E. Coyote moments, in which Quinn and friends can rob a grocery store in broad daylight, then chug 27 shots of liquor, then get whacked in the face, and come out of each visually dizzying scene unscathed.

The Royal Tenem-sake-bombs

Birds of Prey trailer

And what a show this is to watch. Each fight scene revels in largely unbroken camera shots, allowing us to marvel in Robbie pulling off a surprising number of her own martial-arts stunts. (This Hong Kong-worthy fight cinematography made me blurt to an accompanying friend: "John Wick? Meet John Chick." My friend insisted I not use that line in this review. And yet.) Birds of Prey also employs a ridiculous mix of slow-motion footage and overblown sound effects to sell punches, bat strikes, and limb dislocations. (No, the slow-motion impact moments never get old.)

There's also the matter of some of the best set design I've ever seen in a Western action film. Every location, from Black Mask's cocaine-chic lair to his mirrors-and-neon nightclub, or the romp through a never-ending flea market that leads to Quinn's ramshackle apartment, is peppered with memorable details. I can still close my eyes and recall the scenes vividly—as if Wes Anderson and Kesha had a freak lovechild. This is only boosted by a series of tastefully placed, Beavis & Butthead-caliber gags, which squeeze bellybuster laughs out of otherwise rote or plot-sewing moments.

Again, it's Robbie who brings these scenes to life the most in Birds of Prey, as she turns in her most Charlie Chaplin-caliber performance to date. Whether it's a co-star, a massive mallet, a pair of rollerskates, or a precious breakfast sandwich, Robbie's take on Harley Quinn turns everything she touches into something funnier and more interesting. Bravo, DC Comics. You did something I never thought imaginable after Batman V Superman: You made me a believer. Consider Birds of Prey your first must-see action film of 2020.

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2020-02-07 13:00:00Z
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Justin Bieber & Quavo Shine Spotlight On Disadvantaged Women & Youth In New Video For ‘Intentions’ - Hollywood Life

A week before going through ‘Changes,’ Justin Bieber decided to show his true ‘Intentions.’ That turned out to be an incredible show of generosity for a transitional residence for women and children in LA!

First, Justin Bieber gave his fans a taste of his new album, and they thought it was “Yummy.” Then, he recruited Kehlani to help tell Beliebers everywhere that they can “Get Me.” Now, one week before Changes is set to drop, Justin, 25, teamed up with Migos’s Quavo to reveal his “Intentions.” In the song and video, both released on Feb. 7, Justin gushes about a special someone — ahem, presumably his wife Hailey Baldwin, 23 — who needs “no filter” and whom Justin wants to “shower” with all his “attention.” Those are his “only intentions” — however, the intentions behind the accompanying music video run much deeper.

Instead of focusing on a love interest in the video, Justin and Quavo shot much of their video at Alexandria House in Los Angeles. It’s a safe space for women and children in “the process of moving from emergency shelter to economic stability and permanent housing,” according to the non-profit organization’s website. The music video also highlights individuals who are struggling for a better education and better path in life. One of the music video’s stars is Bahri, a girl born in Saudi Arabia who is now trying to become the first person in her family to attend college. She has to borrow a car or commute for a total of four-six hours on the bus to attend and return from class, so as a special surprise, Justin surprises the student with a car! Justin kept the generosity rolling by setting up an INTENTIONS Fund for $200,000 to help more women.

The release of “Intentions” comes days after Justin revealed the tracklisting and features of Changes. Actually, Justin “released” the tracklist for Changes on Feb. 4 through an Instagram Filter. The “What Changes Track Are You?” allowed someone to find out just that. It was an exciting way to roll out the names of Changes’ songs but didn’t really clue fans into whether or not Justin would have any more guests on this album. Thankfully, he expanded on the list the following day. Justing tweeted out the song order, along with the features. In addition to the previously mentioned Kehlani and Quavo, Changes will also have appearances by Post Malone and Clever (“Forever”), Lil Dicky (“Running Over”), and Travis Scott (“Second Emotion”).

Justin’s Changes will be, in order: “All Around Me,” “Habitual,” “Come Around Me,” “Intentions,” “Yummy,” “Available,” “Forever,” “Running Over,” “Take It Out On Me,” “Second Emotion,” “Get Me,” “ETA,” “Changes,” “Confirmation,” “That’s What Love Is,” “At Least For Now,” and the Summer Walker remix of “Yummy.” It’s unclear if whether or not “Changes” is an original composition or a cover of either Black Sabbath or David Bowie’s song of the same name, though it’s likely the former.

Justin’s relationship with Post dates back years, back when he was just known as the “White Iverson” rapper. Post and Justin infamously got into a bit of “roughhousing” in 2016. While at a Houston nightclub, Post — who was opening for Justin on his Purpose tour, grabbed Justin by the neck. Justin supposedly put a lit cigarette out on Post’s arm while the “Circles” singer was performing. Post later tweeted, “he’s my big brother and we like to rough house. If we was fighting, someone would have done something instead of just sit around while the Biebs gets choke-slammed. End of story, I love [Justin] more than life.” Justin and Post would later poke fun at the whole incident.

Bieber previously worked with Lil Dicky on the comedy rapper’s “Earth” song. He also teamed up with Quavo on “I’m The One,” the DJ Khaled joint that also featured Lil Wayne and Chance The Rapper. Travis, by the way, was also featured on Purpose. He spat a few verses on Justin’s “No Sense,” so “Second Emotion” is a reunion of sorts.

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2020-02-07 05:31:00Z
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Kamis, 06 Februari 2020

Brutally Honest Oscar Ballot: '1917' "Gimmicky," Renee Zellweger "Nailed It" - Hollywood Reporter

Andrew Cooper/Sony Pictures

My favorite film of the year didn't even get a nomination — I'm embarrassed to admit it because a lot of people hated it, but it was Yesterday. That movie made me feel fucking great. Two movies that I really hated were Ford v Ferrari and Little Women. The director [of Ford, James Mangold] knows nothing about racing, and admitted as much at the Q&A after it screened at the Academy — you don't have someone putting on their goggles once they're already driving or staring longingly at the guy in the next car as he passes him! [The 1966 film] Grand Prix had class and style and knew what it was about. With Little Women, the timeline was ridiculous — I was really confused sometimes, and I know I'm not the only one. Thank God she [star Saoirse Ronan] cut her hair, because that at least gave me a bit of a reference point. As for Marriage Story, I needed to care for the kid, and I didn't. And I know that those two actors [Adam Driver and Scarlett Johansson] poured their souls into those roles, but it's getting harder and harder for me to care about entitled people's marital relationships. It wouldn't have been that hard to say, "I'll stay in New York, you go to LA and work for a while," stay married, hook-up when you can and be bicoastal. The rest of the nominees I really liked. The Irishman, as much as I loved it and its performances, is not [the 1995 film also directed by Martin Scorsese] Casino — after Hoffa was dead, the movie was done for me, my ass was sore and I wanted to get the fuck out of there. I love Parasite — super-smart, brilliant director [Bong Joon Ho], the movie looks great and the whole look into class struggle was terrific — but once the murdering started happening they lost me. Joker was excellent, but it's not a best picture. 1917 was great but gimmicky, and rang a little hollow for me in the same way that Dunkirk rang a little hollow for me. Once it got down to Jojo Rabbit and Once Upon a Time in Hollywood, it was hard for me. I wish I could have voted for them both. Once I realized it was okay to laugh at Jojo, it was great — so funny and so applicable to where we are today. But Once Upon a Time in Hollywood gave me real escape at a time when I wanted nothing more. I don't jump up and down for [Quentin] Tarantino movies — the last movie of his that I liked before this one was [the 1997 film] Jackie Brown — but this movie made me feel good. We all have our ups and downs in this business — I'm not at the high-point of my career right now, so I could identify very much with the characters, and Once Upon a Time in Hollywood gave me hope. And it leaves you thinking about what could have been in a better world: What would Sharon Tate's life have been if this hadn't happened? What would [Roman] Polanski's life have been?! It puts tears in my eyes when I think about it.

MY VOTE (1) Once Upon a Time in Hollywood; (2) Jojo Rabbit; (3) 1917; (4) Joker; (5) Parasite; (6) The Irishman; (7) Marriage Story; (8) Little Women; (9) Ford v Ferrari

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2020-02-07 00:21:00Z
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5 biggest Oscar surprise wins in history - Fox News

Award shows can be full of surprises, and the Academy Awards are no different.

Some years, a consensus forms about who or what film should win. Other years, upsets occur that create timeless memories, such as when Italian actor Roberto Benigni walked on chairs after "Life is Beautiful" won for best foreign language film in 1999.

Below is a short list of surprise wins in the award show's 92-year history.

1991: Kevin Costner beats Martin Scorsese

Costner scored two big wins at the 63rd Academy Awards when he took home Oscars for best director and best picture for his western film, "Dances with Wolves."

Kevin Costner, winner of Best Picture and Best Director for "Dances with Wolves" at the 1991 Academy Awards. (Photo by Barry King/WireImage)

Kevin Costner, winner of Best Picture and Best Director for "Dances with Wolves" at the 1991 Academy Awards. (Photo by Barry King/WireImage)

Scorsese's "Goodfellas" was considered a favorite and had garnered Joe Pesci the best supporting actor award earlier in the night for his portrayal of a sociopathic New York mobster, which he played alongside Robert De Niro.

1977: "Rocky" edges out "Taxi Driver" and "All the President's Men"

Sylvester Stallone, with producers Irwin Winkler (L), and Robert Chartoff (R), receive the Best Picture award for their movie Rocky during the 49th Academy Awards ceremony. (Photo by Axel Koester/Sygma via Getty Images)

Sylvester Stallone, with producers Irwin Winkler (L), and Robert Chartoff (R), receive the Best Picture award for their movie Rocky during the 49th Academy Awards ceremony. (Photo by Axel Koester/Sygma via Getty Images)

Sylvester Stallone's film about a Philidelphia boxer who goes the distance against heavyweight champion Apollo Creed took home the night's best picture award, beating out "Taxi Driver" and "All the President's Men." All three films would go on to become movie classics, and the Rocky franchise spawned several more films.

1999: "Shakespeare in Love" beats out "Saving Private Ryan"

Many thought the Oscar for best picture belonged to the Steven Spielberg World War II drama. However, the film depicting a love affair between William Shakespeare and Viola de Lesseps, played by Gwyneth Paltrow, while he was writing "Romeo and Juliet" benefitted from a marketing campaign engineered by now-disgraced movie mogul Harvey Weinstein.

Former Miramax Films executive Harvey Weinstein (3rd L) and actress Gwyneth Paltrow (3R) with producers of "Shakespeare in Love" holding their Oscars in Press Room at Academy Awards. (Photo by Mirek Towski/DMI/The LIFE Picture Collection via Getty Images)

Former Miramax Films executive Harvey Weinstein (3rd L) and actress Gwyneth Paltrow (3R) with producers of "Shakespeare in Love" holding their Oscars in Press Room at Academy Awards. (Photo by Mirek Towski/DMI/The LIFE Picture Collection via Getty Images)

Paltrow took home the award for best actress and Spielberg won for best director. "Saving Private Ryan" would go on to garner critical acclaim, particularly for its opening portrayal of the Normandy landings.

1942: "Citizen Kane" versus "How Green Was My Valley"

Time has been a lot more kind to "Citizen Kane" since it lost to "How Green Was My Valley" for best picture in 1942. The Orson Welles film routinely tops critics lists of best movies ever made.

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2006: Three 6 Mafia becomes first hip-hop group to take home a statue 

Jordan Houston, Paul Beauregard and Cedric Coleman of Three 6 Mafia, winners Best Song for "It's Hard Out Here for a Pimp? from "Hustle &amp; Flow" during the 78th Annual Academy Awards. (Photo by Steve Granitz/WireImage)

Jordan Houston, Paul Beauregard and Cedric Coleman of Three 6 Mafia, winners Best Song for "It's Hard Out Here for a Pimp? from "Hustle &amp; Flow" during the 78th Annual Academy Awards. (Photo by Steve Granitz/WireImage)

The Memphis-based group shocked the film world when they scored an Oscar win for “It’s Hard Out Here for a Pimp,” the theme song for "Hustle & Flow," which launched the careers of Terrence Howard and Taraji P. Henson.

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2020-02-07 00:16:49Z
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The Doomsday Oscar Ballot - Slate

Moloch sits onstage at the Oscars.

An artist’s rendering of King Solomon’s Oscar prophecy.

Ever since Louis B. Mayer first proposed the idea at a banquet in a private dining room deep beneath Los Angeles’ Ambassador Hotel in January of 1927, the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences has been dedicated to one goal: producing a slate of Oscar winners that is so accursed, so evil, and so contrary to the laws of God, man, and nature that the howls of agony from moviegoers around the world awaken Azathoth from his deathless slumber at the center of the universe, rending time and space forever asunder and ushering in the Age of Excruciation. Although the academy has diligently pursued Mayer’s vision of cosmic annihilation at the hands of unspeakable elder gods in the decades since, their unholy rites have always failed.

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Or almost failed: In 2006, the prize was nearly within its grasp. At the moment Crash was announced as the Best Picture winner, a night watchman at the site of the Ambassador Hotel, then mid-demolition, reported that the walls of the Embassy Ballroom dripped blood, and the evening broadcast of local radio station KDLD was briefly interrupted by the sound of a hideous, inhuman voice, laughing with awful delight. Although the universe was not destroyed that evening, the night wasn’t a total loss: Philip Seymour Hoffman won Best Actor, and the next morning, a janitor at the Los Angeles Central Library discovered a hidden chamber in the central tower containing the remains of former city librarian Mary L. Jones’ alchemical laboratory. Jones’ notebooks had long since been rendered illegible by the elements, but a single sheet of vellum of unknown origin, scrawled with what initially appeared to be a variant of Agrippa’s celestial alphabet, somehow survived.

Two weeks ago, that scroll was finally deciphered—it turned out it was written in Wingdings—and although it will be some time before it is fully authenticated, it appears to be the Necrocinematicon, the legendary prophecy of doom said to have been written by King Solomon during his studies into Canaanite god Moloch. The good news is that the Jones scroll will add immeasurably to our understanding of the ancient world. The bad news is that Solomon, working in roughly 927 B.C., seems to have somehow written a description of the 92nd Academy Awards: “Babylon the great will rise once more to the west, and all the world will partake of her sins and plagues, and they will make them a molten statuette to worship, and offer it 91 sacrifices, but on the 92nd, the seal will be opened.” Stranger still, it ends with what appears to be a more or less valid ballot for the 2020 Oscar ceremony. Theologians and awards season experts say that although Solomon’s choices would undoubtedly make for a terrible Oscar ceremony, they don’t seem to have been chosen based on the quality of the films in question but rather on the amount of pain, suffering, and confusion they would cause if they won in their categories.

Although the Necrocinematicon prophecy is just a list of categories and names, and doesn’t include any commentary on the winners, we’ve reached out to occultists and awards race watchers—all of whom are wiser than Solomon when it comes to the motion picture industry, in the sense that it didn’t exist in Solomon’s day—to try to decipher what we can expect to see happen at this year’s Academy Awards. Here, then, is Slate’s Oscar prophecy, divined from the writings of King Solomon himself. Fingers crossed.

Actress in a Supporting Role: Scarlett Johansson, Jojo Rabbit

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The first award of the night will be disappointing, perhaps, but not particularly ominous until Johansson, halfway through a run-of-the-mill acceptance speech, begins speaking in tongues. She will be as surprised as anyone—and will quickly be ushered off stage.

Documentary (Feature): The 92nd Academy Awards

The first moment of truly alarming weirdness in the ceremony will come when presenter Will Ferrell opens the envelope for the winning feature documentary and discovers that the winner is apparently (a) a television program (b) that is currently in progress. Most of the audience will believe this to be a joke, until Oscars director Glenn Weiss, moving stiffly and unnaturally, as though his limbs were not completely under his control, leaves the production booth for the stage to accept an award he is not eligible for, for a television program he has not yet finished directing. He will thank “the movies,” stagger off stage, and never be seen again.

Makeup and Hairstyling: Maleficent: Mistress of Evil

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No one involved in presenting this award will notice that the card reads “Maleficent: Mistress of Evil,” not “Paul Gooch, Arjen Tuiten, and David White, for Maleficent: Mistress of Evil.” Fortunately, she’s not one to hold a grudge.

Costume Design: Jojo Rabbit

As with Johansson’s win, no one will be too alarmed by another Oscar going to Jojo Rabbit until the acceptance speech, a tribute to designer Hugo Boss, whose work was such an inspiration for Jojo Rabbit’s costumes.

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Production Design: The Hollywood & Highland Center

Once again, the presenters will be caught flat-footed at the contents of their envelope. This time, with no one to present the award to, the hapless accountants from PricewaterhouseCoopers will be brought out to try to figure out what has happened. But as the presenters huddle onstage, the card with the name of the award winner will be ripped from one of their hands by a sudden gust of wind, float through the air (pursued by PAs) out the emergency exit, and land in the mouth of one of the elephants that looms over Hollywood & Highland, where it will burst into flames and vanish from our dimension forever.

Cinematography: Lawrence Sher, Joker

This will just be a normal Oscar win for Joker, which will cause enough suffering all on its own.

Sound Editing: Joker

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Again, there’s no need for anything supernatural to happen for a Joker win to please Azathoth the Devourer.

Sound Mixing: Joker

Azathoth loves Joker is what we’re prophesying. It’s like his favorite movie, practically.

International Feature Film: Joker

This one will be a big disappointment for Parasite, but not to the Elder Gods.

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Film Editing: Unknown

At the moment that the winner for film editing is announced, the television broadcast will unexpectedly cut to a time lapse shot of a decomposing fox. With director Glenn Weiss nowhere to be found after his unexpected Oscar win, no one at the ceremony will notice, and the winner of the Film Editing Academy Award will never be known.

Actor in a Supporting Role: Anthony Hopkins, The Two Popes

The TV broadcast will abruptly resume in the middle of Anthony Hopkins’ acceptance speech, capturing the last two minutes of Hopkins’ five-minute performance of that tongue noise he did in The Silence of the Lambs.

Animated Feature Film: I Lost My Body

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The Oscar for Animated Feature Film will be awarded to I Lost My Body without incident, except that the stage monitors that were supposed to show a clip from the film will instead show grainy black-and-white footage of a hand of glory, floating endlessly in the void.

Short Film (Animated): “The Cameraman’s Revenge”

It is not clear to anyone why the envelopes demand that the Academy Award for short animated film be given to “The Cameraman’s Revenge,” a pre-Soviet experimental stop-motion film from 1912, in which the carapaces of dead insects are made to enact a grim tale of adultery and revenge porn. It is clear, however, that the beetles that begin streaming from the award envelope are very real and very hungry.

Documentary (Short Subject): “Faint Hearts Don’t Sell Fair Ladies”

This isn’t even a film, it’s a Jam Handy filmstrip designed to train salesmen to successfully convince women to purchase a 1960 Chevrolet Corvair, the unsafe at any speed car. The moment the envelope is opened, a ghastly voice will be heard throughout the theater, intoning “Although a woman is sensitive to color and style, and will probably be most immediately attracted to them, it’ll take facts to get her signature on the order.”

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Visual Effects: Avengers: Endgame

Azathoth loves this movie.

Short Film (Live Action): “Electrocuting an Elephant”

Electrocuting an Elephant,” Thomas Edison’s 1903 film of the death of Topsy at Coney Island, will not actually win this award. No one will win this award. But “Electrocuting an Elephant” will spontaneously play on the monitors behind them as the awards presenters open the envelope and their heads burst into flames. The broadcast will cut to a crowd reaction shot, and the sound of thunderous laughter and applause will play over footage of hundreds of stars, none of whom are laughing or clapping. When the camera returns to the stage, the presenters will have vanished completely.

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Writing (Adapted Screenplay): Jojo Rabbit

As Solomon knew, there is no novel that cannot be improved by adding an imaginary Hitler to it. Finally, the academy will acknowledge this truth.

Writing (Original Screenplay): Parasite

Bong Joon-ho and Han Jin-won will be halfway to the stage before the presenters—two actors who seem familiar but whose faces keep blurring and shifting—read the rest of the card, specifying that the parasite in question is Ba’al-El, the Worm Who Sleeps Not, who will promptly erupt from the stage and swallow up the unlucky screenwriters.

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Music (Original Score): Randy Newman, Marriage Story
Music (Original Song): “I Can’t Let You Throw Yourself Away,” Randy Newman

Randy Newman wins are not all that surprising, but his solo performance of “O Fortuna”—delivered in the original Latin and sung in Newman’s avuncular style—will not be what anyone was expecting.

Actor in a Leading Role: Joaquin Phoenix, Joker

Even Azathoth appreciates a performance this electrifying.

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Actress in a Leading Role: Judy Garland, Renée

This will truly be one of the most horrifying awards speeches in Oscar history, although the moment where Garland thanks Louis B. Mayer will be pretty touching.

Directing: Todd Phillips, Joker

As Phillips takes the stage to receive his Oscar, the walls of the Dolby Theatre will crumble and fall, giving the frozen, terrified audience their first glimpse of the eerie blue light streaming from the manholes and sewers along Hollywood Boulevard.

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Best Picture: Joker

Azathoth’s triumph will be complete, and the Age of Excruciation will begin in earnest. So be it, so be it, so be it, amen.

We’ll have to wait until Sunday to see how accurate Solomon’s Oscar prophecy turns out to be, but one thing is certain: It’s going to be a big night for the movies!

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2020-02-06 21:17:00Z
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Gayle King says clip of interview about Kobe Bryant was 'out of context' - CNN

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2020-02-06 20:46:43Z
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This 1 Tweet Pretty Much Sums Up the Difference Between Kate Middleton and Meghan Markle - Showbiz Cheat Sheet

Kate Middleton and Meghan Markle have received very different media treatment since both of them joined the royal family (Meghan has since left the family). Over the past few years, Meghan has dealt with a lot of negativity from the British media, and it eventually proved to be too much for her.

Earlier this year, Meghan and Prince Harry ultimately decided to leave the family, and it left some people wondering why. But one tweet easily summed up the stark difference between Kate and Meghan when it comes to the media.

Kate Middleton and Meghan Markle
Kate Middleton and Meghan Markle | Clive Mason/Getty Images

Kate and Meghan were reportedly feuding during Meghan’s time in the family

When Meghan first married Harry, it seemed to be the start of a very happy ending. But the Duchess of Sussex quickly realized that things weren’t going to be so easy. Almost instantly, rumors started to swirl that Meghan and Kate did not get along.

Though the rumors were never proven true, it resulted in a lot of the British public choosing sides — and many of them chose Kate. The feud seemed to be the fuel that started the fire of poor treatment toward the Duchess of Sussex, despite that there was never any confirmation of a feud to begin with.

Kate Middleton and Meghan Markle
There is no true proof of a feud between the two duchesses. | Chris Jackson/WPA Pool/Getty Images

The two women have been treated very differently by the British press

When Kate first joined the family, she was welcomed by the media with open arms. The press instantly adored her, and since they always published positive stories about her, the public quickly learned to love her as well. Plus, Kate was the first wife to marry into the family between Prince William and Prince Harry, which meant the press didn’t have anyone to compare her to.

Meghan, on the other hand, was instantly compared to Kate when she joined the royals. And since Kate had built up such a strong reputation among the royal public, it was hard for Meghan to compete. Though the comparison wasn’t appropriate by the press, it was, in some ways, to be expected.

1 tweet sums up the major difference between the two: Their media treatment

Kate and Meghan have, undoubtedly, received completely different media treatment since becoming royals. And it just might be the biggest difference between them. Though the media has suggested the two have nothing in common, the only true similarity they likely don’t share is their portrayal in the media.

Dr. Benjamin Janaway, a psychiatrist with a verified Twitter account and more than 33,000 followers, tweeted what seems to be the perfect example of the way the media treats each woman. Janaway suggests that The Sun, a popular British tabloid, would spin the same story about each woman into something positive for Kate and something negative for Meghan. Janaway’s tweet says that if Kate were to breathe, The Sun would say she “leads way on fueling trees,” but if Meghan were to breathe, The Sun would say she’s “stealing” the public’s air.

Kate has thrived in the family, but it’s always been easy for her

Kate immediately found her way in the spotlight; the transition for Meghan wasn’t so easy. But a major part of that could be that the media instantly took a liking to Kate, which helped her acclimate to royal life so quickly. It’s easy to adapt when one is so adored by the public; when it’s the opposite, it’s not.

Meghan and Harry’s decision to leave the family seemed to be the only way to escape the harsh microscope that Meghan was constantly under. Hopefully they’ll find their way now that they’ve officially exited royal life.

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2020-02-06 19:10:55Z
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